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Madeleine McCann: Kate McCann's diary reveals anguish of losing her

HOMEPAGE NEWS REPORTS INDEX KATE & GERRY MCCANN NEWS SEPTEMBER 2008
Original Source: TELEGRAPH: 15 SEPTEMBER 2008

By Richard Edwards, Crime Reporter  10:03PM BST 14 Sep 2008

 

 The diary of Kate McCann has laid bare for the first time her inner despair at Madeleine going missing in Portugal
 

The entries reveal frustration at the Portuguese police from the very start of their investigation, her darkest thoughts and fears, and her daily, desperate pleas to God for her prayers to be answered.

 

 

At the height of the smear campaign against the McCanns, Portuguese investigators made extracts from the diary public, deliberately selected in a bid to portray the couple as cold and dispassionate.

 

 

The full context of the journal, however, written in an A4 pad, have been revealed in a tabloid newspaper after being leaked by a Portuguese reporter.

 

 

On the night of May 3 when Madeleine went missing from their apartment in Praia da Luz, and early the following morning, Kate suggests that no police were helping in the search.

 

 

The diary says: "No sleep, Gerry and I started looking through the streets at 6am as it was starting to get light. Nobody around. Why not? Desperate."

She said that when she finally talked to detectives they were unsympathetic and "far from inspiring".

 

Kate signs every entry off with a personal message of her love for Madeleine, but admits that with each night it became harder to go to bed without her.

 

On June 1 she writes: "Can't stop thinking about Madeleine, about her fear and pain.

 

"How can I go on knowing that her life could have ended like this? This week I have been quite overtaken by black thoughts. Please God, bring her back."

 

The next day she writes: "Cried in bed - I can't avoid it. I need her close to me. Thinking about her fear of pain breaks my heart.

 

"Thinking about paedophiles makes me want to tear at my own skin."

 

The diary also reveals how she wrote to JK Rowling for help in keeping Madeleine's plight in the public eye and that Gordon Brown, Tony Blair, his wife Cherie and David Miliband phoned the couple to offer their support.

 

It was written between April and July 2007, before police seized it as their investigation turned on the couple.

 

September 2007

01 MAIL-13-09-2007

Kate McCann's Madeleine diaries could fetch 1 million from publishers

 

July 2008

02

CORREIO DA MANHA 26-07-2008

Kate forced political pressure Revelations Maddie's mother's notes prove Goncalo Amaral right
     
03 CORREIO DA MANHA 27-07-2008 Secrets of Kate: Walks were staged
     
04 CORREIO DA MANHA 27-07-2008 Kate managed the news and controlled the English
     
05 CORREIO DA MANHA 28-07-2008 Kate irritated with the PJ on the first day
     
06

CORREIO DA MANHA 28-07-2008

Policeman irritates Kate for not offering coffee
     
07 SUN 28-07-08 Kate's Maddie diaries leaked
     
08

CORREIO DA MANHA 29-07-2008

Kate tried everything to accuse Murat
     
09

CORREIO DA MANHA1-29-7-2008

Kate tried everything to accuse Murat -1
     
10

CORREIO DA MANHA 30-7-2008

McCanns pressure PJ
     
11

CORREIO DA MANHA 31-07-2008

Kate tried to hide twins' tantrums
 

August 2008

12

CORREIO_DA_MANHA 01-08-2008

Kate McCann devalued clues
     
13

CORREIO_DA_MANHA1 -01-08-2008

Kate devalued 'leads' of Maddie  
 

September 2008

14 ANTENA3 11-09-2008 Kate McCann was obsessed with getting her children to sleep
     
15 NEWS OF THE WORLD 14-09-2008 Read Kate  McCann's diary
     
16 MAIL 14-09-2008 Kate McCann's secret diary: 'How can I go on knowing Madeleine's life could have ended like this?'
     
17 MAIL1 14-09-2008 My sweetheart, my darling...Kate McCann's secret Madeleine diary revealed Daily Mail
     
18 TELEGRAPH_15_09_2008 Madeleine McCann: Kate McCann's diary reveals anguish of losing her
     
19 EXPRESS- 15-09-2008 HEARTBREAK DIARY REVEALS KATE'S ANGER AND DESPAIR
     
20 GUARDIAN 18-09-08 News of the World in hot water for publishing Kate McCann's diaries
     
21 MIRROR-19-09-2008

Kate McCann furious at publication of diary in Sunday tabloid

     
22 SUN-19-09-2008 Kate McCann: An apology
     
23 NEWS OF THE WORLD 20-09-08 Kate McCann apology
     
24 SKY NEWS-21-09-2008 Paper's Apology Over Kate's Diary
     
Kate McCanns Diary & Gerry McCanns Blog Comparison

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